Rules for Making a Percy Jackson Fanfiction
by Piplope
Summary: Percy, Annabeth, and the rest of the CHB gang sit down and have a talk with fangirls(and fanboys) about their... fanfictions. Funny if you're tired of NicoXmary-sue, Percabeth fluff, and Annabeth-as-a-typical-teenage-girl-until-Percy-cam e-along.
1. Chapter 1

Rules for Making a Percy Jackson Fanfiction

Percy sat down in his wheelie leather chair and rested his elbows on the wooden desk.

"Will they be here?" Percy asked to Annabeth, who was standing behind the desk.

"Any minute now." She said, looking around the room, and then checking the knife that was strapped to her arm. For protection, but it only made Percy feel more nervous.

Percy folded his hands and then rested his hands. What was taking so long? He glanced up to the wall clock, which read 1:00. What time were they supposed to be here? Annabeth said they should be here at any time, but Percy seemed to clearly remember putting 12:00 in the afternoon.  
As Percy is fixing his dark black hair with a single grey stripe(which was slowly beginning to fade) when they came in.

They.

The fangirls.

A few of the girls were red in the face as they pushed into the small room. Annabeth cursed under her breath, saying how they should have booked a bigger room.

Percy cleared his throat and began to speak. "Ahem, a few of you can uh, take a seat…" He says. A few of the girls fight over the seat, and Percy notices even a few boys were in the room as well. He shook the thoughts of possible ships out of his head. Why did Annabeth invite so many of them? Percy had only expected three or four to show up.

"Everyone, settle down!" Annabeth shouts above the voices. "Percy's got something to say to you." She says. Some of the girls swoon, and Annabeth shoots them one of her evil glances, Percy snickers.

"Alright, ah, we have gathered you here today… no, not that speech." He says, trying to find the right words. "I mean, we've gathered you particular group here today to… discuss something… ah, tragic that a few of us have discovered."

"My fanfiction?!" One girl shouts out. "Does that mean you love it so much you're going to marry me?"

Annabeth raises an eyebrow to Percy, who shakes his head.

"Ah, no."

"No, Percy's not marrying anyone anytime soon. Or at least, he shouldn't be." She shot him another evil glare before continuing. "We're here to talk about . Particuarly the Percy Jackson and the Olympians section of it."

"So you've read my story?!" Shouts one girl.

"What about mine?" A boy shouts.

"Was I to out of character?"

Voices all around begin shout about their stories, and asking the pair of demigods about their fanfictions, and if they enjoyed reading them or not. But Annabeth didn't say anything at first. She leaned back onto the door and tapped it with her knuckle twice. At first, nothing happened and everyone continued to bombard Annabeth and Percy. But the door suddenly swung open, revealing another demigod with choppy chocolate brown hair.

"Hey, shut up!" The girl, Piper, says. The room becomes eerily quiet. Annabeth looks to Piper, and motions her to do something.

"Oh, sorry, Annabeth! Everyone, listen to Annabeth and Percy. They have something important to tell you." She says. Percy for his mouth and rubs it, obviously glad to have his voice back.

"Alright, thank you Piper." Some of the girls stair at Piper, star struck. "We can handle it from here." Piper leaves and shuts the door behind her, and Percy stood up in his chair.

"The people at camp Half-Blood have recently discovered this ' ' website." He begins explaining. "So, of course we went to the section about us. What we found there was, ah…"

"Not good." Annabeth supplies.

"Yea, sure." Some of the fangirl's faces became upset. Some looked like they were going to cry from the criticism that was just given to them. "The camp was pretty concerned, so we decided to get a bunch of the, um, fangirls about it."

Percy let's that hang in the air for a moment before he continued to speak. "First of all, let's ah, you," He points to one girl, who gleams with happiness as she makes her way to the front of the room. "Can you please describe your fanfiction?"

"Sure!" She smiles. "It's about Percy coming back to camp after being at camp Jupiter, it was before the Mark of Athena," She quickly added, talking about Percy's new book that was released a month or so ago. "And he went to see Annabeth. He found her in her cabin… ah… having sex with someone else."

Percy looked back to Annabeth and saw her face burning bright red at what the girl had said.

"Anyone else want to share their story?" Percy said. One girl rambled on about how everyone at camp forgot about Percy and he disappeared. A male went on about how Percy, Jason, and Nico were all gay for each other. Percy made a vomiting face to Annabeth when he wasn't looking. She giggled. Another girl talked about Annabeth, and how she was a typical teenage girl until Percy came along. One said she was already planning a new fanfiction for The House of Hades, coming out next fall.

"Don't give me any spoilers!" She squeals.

"Uhm, don't worry, I… won't…" Percy replied back.

"Percy, can you please get to the point…" Annabeth says, rolling her eyes.

"Ah, yes!" Percy says, standing up from the desk. "Well, as you all can tell, Annabeth and myself are real people. So is everyone else from the books." Percy began explaining. "And when we found out about fanfiction, we were thrilled that someone had actually read Riordion's books. It was Annabeth's idea to write them down in the first place. Anyway, when we clicked onto the 'Percy Jackson and the Olympians' section, I expected to see stories about me being awesome." Percy says, and Annabeth rolls her eyes.

"No, we were expecting there to be a bunch of 'what if's'. Like, what if Grover had never found Percy and taken him to Camp Half-Blood? What if Percy decided to stay with Calypso? What if Percy, ah, died while trying to get back the Roman's golden eagle?" Annabeth points out.

"But we didn't find that." Percy says.

Annabeth cuts in for a moment. "No, we did find some like that. Very few, but there were some awesome fanfics."

"Yea, okay." Percy admits. "But, the point is, there's already a bunch of Percabeth fluff. And to much fanfics about Nico becoming your boyfriend. Trust me, I know Nico, and he's not into relationships." Some of the girls get up to argue that, but the door quickly opens, revealing Nico di Angelo himself.

"Percy's right." Nico says with his quiet voice. He stands out in the crowd, as the only person with skin as white as paper, and hair as black as night. His brown eyes look around the room, eying all the fangirls who wanted to scream with delight. "If I was going to date someone, it wouldn't be any of your mary-sue's. It'd be someone strong, who can take care of themselves."

"I can take care of myself!" One girl jumped up and shouted. "Let me be your girlfriend!"

"No, he's mine!" Another girl shouts. Most of the fangirls jump into a pit of hair-pulling, biting, and screeching.

"Hey," Nico shouts, his quiet voice inaudible over the roar of fangirls.

"HEY!" The door opens up again revealing the blond haired Jason Grace. "Everyone, shut up!" Jason quickly leaves the room before people begin to fight over him. The girls stand up and fix their hair before sitting down again.

"Look, I don't even know any of you." Nico admits. "I'm sure you're all nice, but I'm not interested in a relationship anytime soon…" He says, walking to the corner next to Annabeth.

Percy sights and rubs his temples before continuing. "See, this is what I'm talking about. Freaking out over someone who you used to think was fictional. It's madness!" He says.

"So," Annabeth quickly says, wanting to get to the point. "The people at Camp Half-Blood have decided to make rules for you all to follow. Rules for making a Percy Jackson Fanfiction. Hopefully, it will make fanfiction a better place for everyone." Percy laughs at that.

"We'll start breaking out the rules next week." Percy says. "Come back here the same time, same day."

"But before we go," Nico says, the fangirls swooning in to listen to him. "Let's put out rule number 1. _I, Nico di Angelo, is not interested in a relationship._ Nico says, before quickly leaving the room and slamming the door behind him.


	2. Chapter 2

Rules for making a Percy Jackson fanfiction  
Chapter 2, Rule 2

Luke and Thalia sat together in the small, cramped room.

"Percy didn't bother to get a bigger room?" Thalia complained. "After all those… things showed up last week, more will probably show up this week. So why use the same room?"

"Thalia, chill out." Luke says. "It's Percy we're talking about." Luke leans on the wall and Thalia stands up from the chair, pacing back and forth.

"Thalia," Luke says, looking at her. "You're making me nervous. Stop pacing like that." Thalia threw her arms up in the air and shouted. "Well I'm sor-ry I'm nervous! From the way Annabeth described these… fangirls," Thalia said 'fangirls' like it was something horrible that had haunted her dreams.

"They're vicious, Luke." She sighs, and then plops back down onto the chair.

Before Luke can go to Thalia and comfort her, a sea of fangirls (and a few fanboys) floods into the room, taking seats in the chairs provided, or on the floor. Some stand in the back, trying to get a glimpse at the speakers.

"Hey!" Some of them shouted out. "Where are Percy and Annabeth?"

"Percy's sick," Luke says, his voice firm. "Annabeth's back at camp with him. I highly doubt you all would want Percy to cough all over you."

"I wouldn't mind!" One girl swoons, and Thalia rolls her eyes.

"You all are just as crazy as Annabeth had said." Thalia says. "Alright, everyone listen up! Annabeth has ah," Thalia looks to the paper that Annabeth had typed up for her, telling her what to tell the fans for this week. "Ah, whatever. I can handle this myself." Thalia crumbles up the paper and tosses it into the wastebasket. "Annabeth wants me to tell you about grammar and how a bunch of you don't use it very well."

"Most people don't care about grammar!" One girl shouts.

"Am I most people?" Thalia says, glaring at the girl. "Is Annabeth most people?"

"Ah-ah, no…" The girl says, slightly frightened.

"Exactly. So my advice to you? Use grammar. And if you're not sure, get on the computer and open up one of those word-documents. Type up your stories there." Thalia says to them, and then sitting down back in the chair. She props her black combat boots onto the desk, and Luke steps forward. Some of the fans give a slight gasp, and take a few steps back.

"I've got another bonus rule for you." Luke says. "I'm dead."

"If you're dead, then…?" One girl brings forward.

"He's been given special permission." Nico pops in, saying. "I've got to keep a close eye on him. Make sure he doesn't stir up trouble or anything."

"Right, anyway," Luke says, trying to get away from the subject of him talking about him and Kronos. That was something he didn't want to do. "I'm dead. So that means, there should be no 'As it turns out, Luke actually lived and is still a bad guy!' I'm not a bad guy." Luke says.

"But, what about-"A fanboy begins saying, but Thalia interrupted him.

"He said that he's not a bad guy. Leave it at that." She stares at him, and then goes back to picking at her fingers.

"I like the stories about the times before Thalia, Annabeth, and I reached camp." Luke begins. "Those were the good times. Before all this… nonsense." He said.

"Ahh, I remember them." Thalia said. "Before we even found Grover, and it was just the three of us."

"Fun, yet dangerous." Luke replied back, the two reliving old times for a moment. One of the fangirls cleared their throat, bringing Thalia and Luke back into reality.

"Ahem…" Luke says. "Anyway, I'm dead. So, I'm dead. That's it. Now, I did plan on coming back, but…" Luke is about to say something, but quickly sits up, as if he is listening to something no one else can hear.

"Luke?" Thalia says, showing some concern.

"Uhm, never mind." Luke says, shaking his head and scratching the back of his spiky blond hair. "Anyway, I'm dead. So I'm not coming back. I didn't magically survive stabbing myself…" Luke says, feeling a little bit uncomfortable about talking about his own death.

"I think that's about all that we've got for today." Thalia says. "We-I should probably get going…" She says, a little uncomfortable.

"Yea," Luke says, looking at his fingers for a moment, avoiding Thalia's gaze. He looks to the fangirls. "So this week you got two rules for the price of one: _Use grammar_ and _Luke didn't somehow survive._" Luke says the two rules that were given that week. "Come again next week, same day, same time."

"Hopefully Percy'll be better by then." Thalia says hopefully. "Because I really do not want to have to deal with you crazy people anymore." She says, standing up, not waiting for the girls, and few fanboys to follow. She quickly opens up the door, and flees the room, not looking back.

Luke sighs, see's the fan's are waiting for an explanation. "Don't worry, she's okay." Luke says. "Just, go on. Come back again next week. I look forward to reading your improved fanfics." He says, and then races after Thalia, leaving the fans to leave on their own.

_**A/N  
**_**_Sorry this chapter is short! I sort of began running out of idea's. And, it doesn't help that I've got the flue. D: So, I've decided to post one chapter per week. And I want everyone who reads this to post some things that they hate about PJ fanfics in the comments, so I can make more rules. I haven't run out of idea's just yet, but I still want everyone's opinions! Thank's for reading, review and give constructive critasism! _**


	3. Chapter 3

Rules for Making a Percy Jackson Fanfiction

Chapter 3

_Ffffffh!_ A noise shouts out in the silent room as Percy blows his nose, and then drops the tissue into the wastebasket. He leans his head back onto the wall and gives out a long, sick, sigh.

"Percy, are you sure you want to be here?" Annabeth says. "We can call Thalia again, and have her do the meeting. Or we could get Leo or Jason; even Grover wouldn't mind doing it." She says, looking down at Percy, who was rubbing his congested nose.

"I'm fine, Annabeth. A little cold can't keep the great Titan-slaying Minotaur-killer, and Medusa-slayer Percy Jackson!" He says triumphantly, which Annabeth rolls her eyes to.

"Even the mighty Percy Jackson needs to have a day off."

"I did. Last week." He says. "This stupid cold just needs to go away!" Percy stretches his arms behind his head as he leaned back. "You got the notes for this week?"

"Yea," Annabeth says, pulling a piece of printer paper out of a drawer, and Percy instantly knew that reading would be impossible, as the letters jumped off the page at a single glance.

"Uhm, how about no. Can you just tell me what they say?" He says, and Annabeth nods, understanding the dyslexia.

"Yea sure-"

Before Annabeth can recite the words to Percy, girls and a few boys flood into the room, though significantly less than the week before. A few made sure to sit far away from Percy, in fear from catching his sickness. Others got as close as possible, still not getting the hint that Percy already had a girlfriend, and wasn't interested. Annabeth mumbled under her breath as the girls giggled with delight.

"Glad you're feeling better, Percy!" One girl giggles.

"Could I see your abs?"

"Show us your abs!" The girls stop shouting. Annabeth shoots them with a death-glare, but they don't seem to take notice. They slowly begin inching forward, closer to Percy, hoping to get a glimpse at the demigod's muscle.

"Ha-ha, not funny guys." Percy says firmly. "Get back…" He says standing behind the desk making sure the girls didn't get farther than that. Percy looks to Annabeth for help.

"We're not at these meetings to admire Percy's abs," Annabeth begins. "Or any of his other muscles. You all are here to learn how to write better." She sighs.

"What are we doing this week, anyway?" One of the girls who were standing farther back in the room asked.

"Good question!" Percy says, glad to get off of the topic of his muscles. "What are we talking about this week, Annabeth?" Percy asks, looking up into her grey eyes.

"This week," Annabeth smiled. "Is all about me."

Percy looks up at her, confused. "Well, you should sit in the wheelie- chair then," He says, standing up and then offering the big chair up to his girlfriend, who sat down in it pleased. She folded her hands together and rested her elbows on her table, and then rested her head onto it.  
"We're talking about me. I'm not clingy. I'm not a simple teenage girl. I'm not a girly-girl. I'm not week." She says.

"Ooh! Those ones…" Percy sighs, shaking his head. "Those are Annabeth's least favorite. The high school drama ones? If you haven't noticed, Annabeth isn't always concerned with romance."

Annabeth looked to Percy.

"I- I mean, you're great, and I'm not concerned with romance either. Like, if you hair was a mess? I wouldn't care. Romance isn't really a big deal or… anything…"

"What do you mean romance isn't important! It's one of the key elements of any relationship!" Annabeth exclaims. "And what do you mean when my hair was a mess… did it look bad on a date of ours?"

"No, that wasn't the right thing to say, ah, you're hair looked fine, perfect on every date. I'm just saying that if your hair looked bad, then I wouldn't care."

"Uh-huh," Annabeth says, rolling her eyes. "We'll discuss this later," Annabeth turns back to the audience who had been watching the couple fight. "Anyway, I'm not clingy. I'm independent, and half the time I'm the one who's saving his butt." Annabeth jab's her thumb in Percy's direction.

"But, what if-"One girl asks.

"No." Annabeth says plainly. "I'm not, nor have I ever been, or will be, a typical teenage girl. I'm much smarter than the average girl. Much more sophisticated and I don't do that silly 'duck face'." She says.

"I know that, but in mine you're a quiet-"

"Have you even read the series?" Annabeth says. "I'm not quiet. I stand up for myself. Remember Atlas? I held the freaking sky, and yet you all portray me as weak." She says leaving the fan's in awe.

"Well then," Percy says. "I think that might wrap up this week…"

"Oh no," Annabeth replies looking up to her boy friend. "You're not getting off that easy seaweed brain."

"What about lunch in the park? Would that make it up to you?"

"No."

"Lunch under the lake? You can tell me all about your new architecture plans for Olympus, and even draw up some plans for making a building under the water." Percy says, trying to convince Annabeth that he didn't mean what he had said.

"We'll see, seaweed brain." Annabeth says, and then looks back to the audience of fangirls and fanboys. "Alright, you all are dismissed." She sighs.

"And quit making terrible fanfics."

"Have a nice week." Percy says as they leave the room.


	4. Chapter 4

Rules for Making a Percy Jackson Fanfiction

Chapter 4

[For Real This Time]

"Obsession." Nico said as he stared at the fangirls. "This week we are talking about obsession."

One girl raised her hand. "Is this question related to dating me? Because if it is, I'm kicking you out." The girl shook her head. "Then go ahead."

"Mr. di Angelo... ah, where have you been? It's been months." The girl said quietly.

Nico looked to the ground for a moment, attempting to come up with an excuse. "Percy and Annabeth have been ah... busy recently. Annabeth's away at her private school and Percy's off... being Percy..."

"Did they go to prom together?" Another girl swooned.

"How in Hades am I supposed to know?" Nico groaned. He sat down in the wheelie chair and propped his shoes up on the desk. Thalia walked into the room, out of breath.

"Sorry I'm late. I forgot that this was the week we were starting back again. The Hunters and I were having target practice."

"Not with actual people this time, I hope." Nico rolled his eyes.

"No, not with real people. Lady Artemis got mad with us last time we tried to do that. But she did say we were allowed to use some fangirls..." Thalia glared at the fangirls with her electric blue eyes for a moment before bursting out with laughter. "Haha, I'm kidding. Lady Artemis isn't like that. Though she is upset with you all for creating, and I quote, 'fictional works in which I have given up my vows and have fallen in love with a mortal and have given birth to a daughter.' She's also mad because some people paired her up with Percy." Thalia stuck out her tongue.

"Thalia, that's not what we're talking about this week."

Thalia looked at Nico, surprised. "But that's what I got in the e-mail from Annabeth and Percy..."

"Did you get the e-mail that I sent you saying that I had changed it?"

Thalia frowned. "No. Did you send one?"

Nico did a face-palm. "Forget it... You can just leave and I'll do it myself."

"We want Thalo!" The fangirls called out.

"Thalo? Thalia and Nico?" Thalia looked at Nico and stuck out her tongue. "That's gross! I'm way older than him. Plus, he's more of a little brother. No offense, but I wouldn't date you."

"None taken..."Nico said. "Can we please just get this done and over with now? I'm ready to go home."

"Sure, Nico. What did you have in mind to talk about?"

"If you had been here on time, you would have heard. We're talking about obsession."

Thalia nodded. "That's a good one."

A blonde fangirl with braces raised her hand. "What do you mean, obsessed?"

"Directioner obsessed. Knowing about a character so in depth that it's creepy. Like their blood type, what room number they were born in. Their great-great-great uncle twice removed name." Thalia said. "I don't even know that stuff about myself. It'd be weird if you all knew it."

"Rick Riordion should be the only one who knows that stuff." Nico points out. "We've told him some stuff, and he's found some stuff out on his own. I don't even know if he knows my blood type."

"I don't even know my own blood type." Thalia said. "Or what room number I was born in."

"I don't think I was born in a hospital..." Nico whispered, but he tried to make sure that no fangirl heard him.

"Nico, will you date me!" One quickly shouted out causing Thalia to laugh.

"For the last time, no! I barely know you people!"

"Aw, come on, Nico. Would it hurt to take them on one date?" Thalia asked, knowing that she was just pissing Nico off even more.

"Yes. It just might kill me. But then I'd be dead so I wouldn't have to go on a date."

Thalia ruffled Nico's hair and smiled. "I'm pretty sure that's all that short stuff-"

"I'm not short!" Nico interrupted.

"-has for this week. Meetings are going to be start to be held regularly again soon." Thalia smiled, completely ignoring Nico's objection.


	5. Chapter 5

Rules for Making a Percy Jackson Fanfiction

Chapter 5

Annabeth sighed. "Percy, I really don't want to be here." She said, leaning against the door.

Percy shrugged. "Sorry I dragged you down here."

"I wanted to stay at camp."

"And do what? Lie around all day, upset?" Percy rolled his eyes. "Trust me, this'll be good for you."

Annabeth sighed again. She stood behind Percy's chair and wrapped her arms around his neck, kissing him on his head. Percy was about to kiss her back, when the wooden door opened and the fangirls poured in, chatty and jittery as usual. Percy sighed, knowing Annabeth hated this. Knowing that what they said probably wouldn't change what the fans had to write. Percy wanted to believe they were making a difference, even if they weren't.

"Are you guys excited about the PJO ship weeks?" One fan squealed to another, who squealed in reply.

"They sound like baby pigs." Annabeth whispered in Percy's ear, who chuckled.

"Alright, everyone." Percy said. He raised his hand to signal for the fans to quiet down.

"Have you guys seen the Sea of Monsters movie yet?" A fan quickly shot out before Percy could ask any other words.

"I'm sorry, what?" Percy asked again. The girl was talking too fast for the demigod to understand.

"The Sea of Monsters movie. It comes out August twenty-seventh. Don't you guys get a say in it or something?"

Annabeth shook her head. "No, just Riordian does."

"Do you guys get to go to the premier?"

Annabeth and Percy both shook their heads no. There was a long silence in the room before Percy began to speak again. "Alright, so this week we're talking about Mortals Vs. Demigods." He said.

Annabeth nodded her head. She pulled out a copy of _The Lightning Thief _and flipped to the first page. _"Look, I didn't want to be a half blood."_ She read, quoting the book. "Alright, I'm going to teach you all a lesson. The first sentence, or even the first paragraph, or page, of a book is called a 'hook'. It's the author's attempt to draw the reader in and make them want to read it." Annabeth explained. "Why did you pick up _The Lightning Thief_ in the first place?" Annabeth pointed to a girl.

"My friend told me about it." She said.

"I liked the cover art." A second girl answered.

"I wanted to know what a half-blood was, and why Percy," She nodded to him. "didn't want to be a half-blood."

Annabeth smiled at her answer. "That's exactly what I wanted to hear."

A girl with brown hair squished her eyebrows together, and then in a high-pitched annoying voice complained. "What does _this _have to do with anything?" She wined.

"Because," Percy leaned forward and folded his hands on the desk. "There are a lot of fanfictions out there about us being mortals," Percy looked at his wrist, imagining a nonexistent watch before staring back to the sea of fans. "Last I checked, we're _half _mortal and _half_ god."

Annabeth pointed at her boyfriend. "Exactly. Why write a fanfiction where _demigods _are mortals? Didn't you pick up the book in the first place _because_ we were _different__?_" Annabeth pointed out. "Why write a fanfiction, based on a book series with specific characters, and then change the characters entirely? Their race, their personality, their past and their family..." Annabeth rambled.

Percy nodded along. "Alright. I think that's it." He looked up at Annabeth. "Do you have anything else to add?"

"Nico told me to tell you all to stop harassing him. He doesn't want to date you." She smiled and cocked her head to the side. "Leo on the other hand loves being adored, so I suggest seeking his love instead."

And with that, Annabeth grabs Percy's wrist and walks out the door.

**A/N: Hello there lovlies! Remember to post your idea's and constructive critasism! /Sorry I don't write as often as I should =.= I get distracted easily by tumblr. I have a Percy Jackson(and Divergent for those fans too) tumblr blog, which can be found at this address **


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